●愛する人への恋文ご当選おめでとうございます。こんにちは。草木饅頭　総本家　黒田家の黒田です。

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ご当選おめでとうございます。こんにちは。草木饅頭　総本家　黒田家の黒田です。

「・・・」築50年以上のボロい一軒家の一室。俺は、懸賞サイト経由で当選し俺宛に届いた商品の、総本家黒田家の草木饅頭三つを難しい顔で眺めていた。俺がその存在を初認識した時には俺以外の手で既に開封されており、居間に置かれていたのを俺の自室に持って来た。
「よっ」そこに親友が入って来る。
「よっ」俺は草木饅頭を眺めながら視線をそらさず答える。
「おっ、ヤフー懸賞？」草木饅頭に気付いた親友がそう尋ねて来た。
「うん」素っ気無く答える俺。
「お前恋愛運はからっきしなのにそういう運は結構なもんだよな昔から。確かこの前もヤフー懸賞で、」
と言いながら草木饅頭に手を伸ばす親友。
「待て！」俺はそれを慌てて制止する。
「なっ、なんだよ？　三個あるんだからいいじゃん」
「いいか？　その饅頭は八個入りなんだよ？」
「うん、だからお前が五個食べたんだろ？」
流石に大卒は一味違うようだ、こんな難しい計算が瞬時に出来るなんて。
「いや、俺がその宅配物に気付いた時には開封されてて、剥き出しのままで三個だけ入ってたんだ」
「じゃあ、お前の家族が勝手に開封して五個食べたって事じゃないの？」
流石に進研ゼミ通信講座を受けてた奴は着眼点が鋭いぜ。
「そうだろうな」俺は小さく頷いた。
「家族に聞いてみろよ」
「いや、それは無理だ・・・」
「？」
「我が家は崩壊してるから聞けない。聞いちゃったら崩壊してる事にはならないだろ？」
「うっ、うん」親友は何やら腑に落ちない様子だったが納得してくれた。
「でもさ、開封しちゃっただけで、元々懸賞用の草木饅頭が三個入りだったんじゃねえの？」
留学(駅前に)してたこいつの思考力には、俺なんかじゃ到底太刀打ち出来ないようだ。
尤もこんなのは相碁井目なんだから、別に悔しくなんてないが。
「いやそれは無い。黒田家さんにお礼の電話するついでに、何個入りなのか尋ねたから。八個で間違いないらしい」俺は淡々とそう告げる。
「お前って・・・」何故か呆れ顔の親友。

「・・・」
「・・・」

「ま、まぁ、やっぱこんな時に頼りになるのはネットの質問サイトだろ？　聞いてみろよ」
気まずい沈黙を破るかのようにそう提案して来る親友。
「わかった。じゃあ質問してみるよ。『我が家は崩壊してますか？』って」
俺はそう言いながらパソコンの電源を入れ、早速質問サイトで当該質問をしてみる。
「えぇ！？」親友は何故か驚愕している。
「回答来たぞ？　『はいしてます修復不可能です』だってさ」数分後、俺はしたり顔で報告する。
「いや・・・」何やら納得行かない様子の親友の機微を読み取る俺。
「違ったの？　じゃあ『総本家黒田家さんの懸賞用の草木饅頭は八個入りですよね？』って質問すればいいんだな？」と言い終えるや否や、その質問をしている俺。
「えっ・・・」やはり、欲求不満の人妻ばりに親友は何処か不満足そうだ。
「回答来たぞ？　『はいそうです』だってさ」数分後、俺は満面の笑みで報告する。
「えぇぇぇええぇぇぇぇぇえぇ・・・」だらんと全身の力が抜けて崩れ落ちるように脱力する親友。

「なんなのお前？　何がしたいの？　ふざけてるの？」
俺は言われた通りに質問しただけなのに、何やら不満そうな親友に若干切れ気味だった。
「お前もな」

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2010年11月17日の夕飯(火の国熊本とんこつラーメン)。自宅＆空と川と大地の風景 « ホーム » 2010年11月16日の夕飯(焼肉)。自宅＆空と川と大地の風景

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